Stand up Com, Time with mom, and some Cemetery Cinema

INT. COMEDY CLUB. NIGHT

Bright lights flood a stage in the darkened room of a Comedy Club. A Young Man on stage grips a microphone in one hand and a sheet of paper in the other. We see the man pacing this way and that across the stage reading from his jokes he has scrawled on the scrap of paper. He appears confident, perhaps too confident thanks to the FIVE pints of Stella Artois. He engages in some friendly banter with some of the younger (and less threatening) members of the audience and repeatedly asks the audience "how [they're] feeling tonight". His approach has thus far been unconventional to say the least, firing out a joke (which will almost certainly fall flat) and then cashing in on the laughs by providing a commentary of how the previous joke fell flat. This system, however unplanned, has proven the key to his comedy. As he gains momentum, he fails to realize that he has been on stage far longer that the allotted 7 minutes he was required. Lights begin to flicker in the back of the club, a signal to "wrap it up", unfortunately these lights go unnoticed to the "comedian prodigy" as he launches into yet another endless, albeit charming, story about his frustrations with the workout DVD P90X. The house lights eventually come on as he utters his final thought for the evening.

"So it seems like a guy can't open a yogurt lid in this town without supporting Breast Cancer Awareness....Am i Right?" 

"WRAP IT UP!"

"OH! well thanks everyone, have a good night”

It's true. And the bit about the cancer was supposed to be my big moment.

You see, a couple of weeks ago I was checking on the status of my Judge Ross episode release date (like most of you), well THAT whole can of worms has yet to be opened to the public but I saw a posting for a comedy show calling for ACTORS/COMEDIANS, should've just said DANNY/CURTIS. 
(*crickets*) 
Anyways I checked a box requesting more info on what this was (not a whole lot commanding my attention at the office that day other than nodding at the right places to my 20 year old co-worker describing how hung over she was from a totally crazy weekend yada yada yada). Moments after i checked the box, I received a text message informing me that I had just been signed up for a 7-min slot onstage at a comedy club in North Hollywood...What grave mistake had I just made? I bounced the story off of my roommates and Steph, half jabbing the idea with "what a crazy request, ain't no way I would do that" and half gauging the responses like "dude you should give it a shot". "Psshh no way...you think? I mean it would be pretty funny right, just something to check off the 'ol bucket list." I handled the situation in standard form, procrastinating until the day-of to make a decision. 

So I flopped around onstage for 15 minutes, providing fodder for the next 4 comedians "Whaddya think the flashing lights were kid? a Pink Floyd concert?"

BUT also providing some laughs. I was even asked to return to the comedy club the following week to participate in the “newcomers contest”...

Truly surprised


Initialize week recap dream sequence....
 
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So LAST time I posted about how I had done nothing and life was slowing down in LA. This week Julie Curtis certainly remedied that by providing the busiest 6 days I have had in my time out here.


6 Days with Mom:


Wednesday: Julie arrived, hung out in Westwood and grabbed some coffee, Comedy Club that night.
She made a last minute flight change to arrive a day early to attend my performance, and ultimately convinced me into going through with it. 


Thursday: Breakfast at the Grove, made an appearance on EXTRA , Drove out to Santa Monica Pier, Ate at Bubba Gump's Shrimp, saw Bridesmades at the Movie Theater.
We were at "The Grove" outdoor shopping center where they film EXTRA with Latin charmster Mario Lopez. They needed background people to "act interested" in the crowd. We were fish in a barrel by that point. 
In an effort to show my mom LA, Steph and I  panicked and surrendered to the ultimate touristy Santa Monica Pier, and completely lost all credibility when we dined at Bubba Gump's Shrimp Restaurant. 

Easy to "act interested" with this crew...

Hangin at the beach

The Ladies on the Pier 

"Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get."

At the Theater

Friday: Julie takes a walk to Westwood, nearly gets run over, Lunch at Emilio's in the Valley, Costco run with cousin Cheryl, Dinner with Steph's landlord Melanie.
Julie narrowly escapes death this morning while taking a seemingly harmless morning walk. She was pressed into a row of hedges and fled for her safety after traffic was stopped to let her pass. 

Whipping up some Party-Mash

Steph and Sophia

Steph's Wonderful Landlord Melanie Adler, daughter of the Oscar winning Producer Buddy Adler (From Here to Eternity, South Pacific) and Actress Anita Louise

Cousin Jerry and "Tatti" drop in for dinner, keeping it classy

Saturday: Pet Adoption day at the La Brea Tarpits, Grocery shopping, BBQ at Cheryl's
The La Brea Tarpits were hosting a huge pet adoption with over 700 animals, Steph fled to the Cat Tent, I was into the hounds myself.

Adopt him

BBQ in Hollywood

Juj and Cheryl

Life of the party

Sunday: Church, Brunch at Fiddler's Bistro, Drove out to Topanga for a night of Ping Pong and Banana-grams at cousin Jeanne's house. 

Things got heated when Dance Central was turned on the XBOX Kinect. Watching one's own mother "drop it like it's hot" was memorable. 

Church...in a theater

Picture from Jeanne's back deck in Topanga

Monday: Hiking in Malibu, Lunch at Paradise Cove, Dinner at Pink's Hot Dog, Drop off Julie at Airport.
In an attempt to wrap up the LA experience, we managed to pack in a hike (complete with waterfall), lunch on the beach, and one of LA's stapled foods. The drop off at the airport came earlier than anyone expected. Bummer. 

Thanks for a great week mom!

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And then she was gone (POOF!) and I found myself back in front of the KYOCERA printer at Paramount dealing with another paper jam while trying to send our accountant Nham copies of expense reports from 2008. They're a bit backed up on their paperwork it seems, and I was just the guy to bring them back up to speed. 
"Boy do YOU have a fun day ahead of you"
(I had no idea)
When a "run" to STAPLES presented itself, I jumped at the opportunity and raced outside to my car. Ahh but foolish Danny for expressing elation because as I approached my car I soon realized that my front tire was flat...Of course. 
Good thing there is a garage on most corners in LA.
Of course with MY car, when it rains...it pours
The mechanic accepted my vehicle as a sort of mobile death trap, informing me that if the tires or failing brakes don't kill me soon, my broken speedometer will. 
In an attempt to lighten the mood, I told him about how I was stopped at a red light the other day, but my speedometer told me I was somewhere between 120 and 140mph, odometer spinning like G.D. Top.

ME
"Not great for the re-sale, heh heh am I right?" 

HIM
"It would be irresponsible and dangerous to sell this vehicle"

 (pause)


ME
"...can you have it ready in an hour?" 
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Memorial Weekend was great this year:
 
Steph and I, sticking with our pledge to "carpe diem the hell out of this city" grabbed some blankets, booze and snacks and headed to the Hollywood Forever Cemetery to watch a showing of Alfred Hitchcock's "VERTIGO". We showed up an hour early to stand in line with hundreds, then thousands of Angelenos. The cemetery itself was the most lavish and over-the-top I have ever seen. Its funny that even in death, the people in this town will do anything for attention, like have 15-foot marble pillars erected over their grave as a sort of billboard, or building above ground tombs that could only cause one to cringe at the thought of what rent must cost, still others decided to flair it up even more by decorating their death plots like outdoor spas or sculpture gardens, with little rock creeks and lanterns and a plaque reminding you that there is a dead guy underneath all of this, may he rest in peace. Many of the graves had pictures of the deceased etched into the headstones like that art that you find at mall-kiosks, where they give you a block of glass and it has a 3D bird made out of bubbles inside, pretty awesome. Aside from the graveyard itself, I think my favorite part was just sitting on a blanket on actual grass, it's hard to come-by in this town.

Snacking while waiting for the gates to open

Some of the "graves"

A bit more modest

Steph took this photo, she's very proud of it